black blazer moments
Sarah Young, the author of Expansive Impact, tells a story of when she realized a couple of her black blazers were not sparking joy.
These pieces were barely worn. Apparently, they hadn’t sparked joy for a while.
First, she tried to sell the blazers, taking beautiful photos and listing them online.
Despite several price reductions, no takers.
Then she tried to consign the blazers. The woman at the consignment store said, “ These will definitely sell.” They didn’t, the first week, the second week or the third week, or ever.
Finally, she tried to give them away to a few individuals who she thought might be able to use them. Once again, No luck.
Eventually, she donated them, hoping these gorgeous pieces would spark joy in someone and not end up as designer landfill.
Here is the thing she had to accept: while the blazers seemed valuable to her ( They were pretty much new, They were gorgeous, They had only been worn a few times, They were Veronica Beard. ) they weren’t valuable to others.
One person’s giveaway was not another’s treasure.
We can think of this within our workplace and our lives as well.
Just because we value something, it does not mean that others do.
We might value working in person and advocate for a return to the office five days per week, but our team members might value flexibility with the desire to work from home 3 days per week and come in for meetings and collaboration on the other two.
We might value after-hours happy hours and team events as a way to bond, but our team members might value being home with their loved ones or pets during that time.
We might value having conversations about politics and policies with colleagues, but our colleagues might prefer to keep those topics separate from their everyday work.
We might value staying in touch with friends via texts and phone calls, but our friends might value their quiet alone time or unplugged time with kiddos more highly than virtual communication with friends.
We can also consider this in our personal lives if, for example, we have a different love language than our partner does, and we, therefore, value different actions and behaviors as expressions of love and caring.
It isn't necessary that we all value the same things.
However, in our work and our lives, we might pause to consider:
Am I currently experiencing any “ black blazer moments” where I am valuing something differently than others around me? If so, what is the impact?
Are there any situations where I unintentionally project my values onto others? If so, what is the impact?
What is one thing I could do or question I could ask to better understand what my team members or loved ones are currently valuing?
Once I had this black blazer realization, it allowed me to be more present and authentic in many of my relationships and deepened real connections to those I love and even just spend time with.
If anything, it will make your upcoming Thanksgiving holiday a bit easier to navigate. 😉
x ali